Three and a Half Stars

A Christmas Story Review

December 27, 2014 by JD Hansel

I meant to have this up by Christmas day, but unfortunately I got very sick, and wasn’t up for writing anything. Also, I would have a spoiler warning, but it seems there is no need since everyone has seen this movie before. As many have noted before me, everyone has livedthis movie before. It effectively captures the experience of being a child during Christmas time, while also adding elements that are plausible or desirable, which fit in perfectly. This is one of those great movies that should not work, and yet it does. The plot is loosely connected, the protagonist’s goal is unimportant, the pacing is odd, and there are interruptions (daydreams) periodically – and it still works well.

There are flaws, however. I am always bothered when family films, particularly those clearly inviting children to watch them, contain elements that may not be appropriate for children, and this movie does have that. A lot of the jokes are rather weak, which would be bearable if the jokes kept coming constantly, but the film is actually pretty slow. It is difficult for me to stay focused on the film since it has a pace that is bordering on too slow for me and my ADD. The unconventional structure also makes it hard to stay into, but that can only be prevented to some degree since the nature of the story is purely a child’s Christmas experience. I also have issues with the film purely because I can’t totally relate. I didn’t want a gun as a kid, nor did I get bullied, or get bad grades, or lie much really.

Still, I understand why this is a Christmas classic. It’s just not one of my favorite Christmas classics.

Harry Potter 7 Review

December 21, 2014 by JD Hansel

(MINOR SPOILERS)

Yeah, I got tired of writing out the full titles. They’re really long.

Anyway, the seventh film in the Harry Potter series, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part One is dark. By about the third or fourth film, it was clear that this series was not for the children anymore, but now this is especially true. It’s time to bring back beloved characters, bring back characters we didn’t care about and make us love them, and then finally kill them off. It’s also time to bring back old Umbridge, who unfortunately does not get her heart ripped out of her body and her skull bashed in in this film, but I can dream.

It is more fun to see our heroes in the Muggle world than in a Quidditch tournament, so that’s a plus. There’s basically no Hogwarts or Minerva McGonagall, and there’s hardly any Snape or Dumbledore (despite the fact that this would be a great time to learn more about these two characters, particularly the latter.) I have heard that, in the books, there’s a lot more information about Dumbledore revealed, but the movie is not focused on him. The upside to this is that there is more time spent with the main characters, and the lack of Ron means more time focused on Hermione, who is, in my opinion, the most interesting character in the franchise. I would like it if the films would go into her background a little more, and I’d like to see her brain at work, solving mysteries and showing off, but I guess you can’t have everything.

I do believe that this is one of the films that does not have the charm of the first two movies in the series, but the interesting details that are revealed, the focus on the main characters, the interesting drama, and the fascinating plot make it a nice film overall.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier Review

December 19, 2014 by JD Hansel

I’ll try to keep this review simple and spoiler-free.

It’s funny how I’d give Cap 2 about the same rating as Guardians of the Galaxy, but for completely different reasons. Basically, Guardians worked because it was silly and fun, and it knew how to handle that. Cap 2 worked because it was dramatic and mysterious, and it knew how to handle that. I generally like my super hero movies to be light and fun, but this one just keeps the audience engaged in the mysteries of S.H.I.E.L.D. and its enemies, and I felt compelled to try to figure it all out. The drama between characters strangely works because it is handled very carefully, and the light banter between Cap and Black Widow is brilliant.

It’s hard to say why I’m not giving this film a higher rating, but even though I think the stressful time I was having while watching it (for unrelated reasons) may have skewed my view of the film, the fun, colorful feeling I like a superhero movie to have (see Guardians, Burton’s Batman, ‘66’s Batman, Doctor Who: The Movie, Big Hero 6, etc.) just isn’t there. It feels rather pale, like it’s trying to look a little bit like The Dark Knight in terms of lighting and color. While there are certainly fun moments, the movie might be taking itself a little too seriously overall.

If you like a movie that keeps your mind working and is packed with surprises and suspense, you’ll enjoy this one. (Just be sure to catch up on the Marvel films that precede it – otherwise it won’t be half as fun.)

Big Hero 6 Review

November 13, 2014 by JD Hansel

MINOR (MINOR) SPOILER ALERT

Watching this movie was an odd experience for me because I felt like I was a spectator rather than part of the experience. That is not to say that I did not enjoy it. Big Hero 6 is a well built film, that successfully makes the characters likable, the story understandable and interesting, and the twist sorta kinda mildly surprising. The score to this movie is really cool, and it accompanies the lovely animation (that often had me gushing at its beauty, which I hardly ever do with CG movies) very nicely.

They were even kind enough to label the hero of the movie! I’ve been wanting movies to do that for a long time.

Essentially, this is a good movie that was done correctly. However, it felt distant to me. Maybe it’s just because CG films tend to have that effect on me for some reason, or maybe it’s because I went in with an observer-like mindset. I think a large part of my problem was the fact that it was, at its core, a superhero movie. It is about a genius who has the ability to make the gadgets and gear necessary to fight a masked criminal, who happens to be the guy who caused the death of someone important to the hero. We have seen that movie before. This movie may introduce new elements, but it does have a rather cliché story, and pretty cliché characters, making it seem like I have seen it before. It also has notable Disney movie clichés, which also make me step out of the experience and become an observer.

Still, this is a fun movie that has many impressive elements, and is certainly a good time for the kids. If you like simple stories in slightly futuristic worlds with simple characters and great animation, you’ll really enjoy this one.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince Review

September 10, 2014 by JD Hansel

(SPOILERS)

I think a better name for this film would have been Harry Potter and the Half As Much Snogging As There Should Have Been, because frankly, it’s all about the characters and their relationships. The characters’ relationships are what have me anxiously watching the film and enjoying it. Harry and Ginny keep one glued to the screen, and Hermione and Ron even more so. The scene with Ron as he unconsciously mutters Hermione’s name is absolutely brilliant. I would have written something like that myself if I could have thought to do it that way. What makes that scene even more delightful is Snape standing there, presumably trying not to vomit. I think this film makes the main characters, especially Hermione, finally get the attention they should have had in the third and fourth films.

Oh, and there’s also a plot in this movie somewhere, but it’s not very strong. In the end, we learn that the task that Harry must complete in the climax of the film (if you can call it that) really doesn’t do much good. All of the efforts made by the characters in this film seem somehow futile, aside from giving them an idea of what they need to accomplish in the next film. It feels empty, and all of the focus on the Half-Blood Prince does not help. It might have meant something had it been revealed in the end that Snape was evil rather than at the beginning of the film, but because of the way this was set up, the big reveal does not feel very big at all. The Half-Blood Prince could have been just about anyone and it wouldn’t have made a difference: Lucius Malfoy, Hagrid, Dobby, Hedwig, or H. R. Pufnstuf.

The ending with the death of Dumbledore does emotionally impact the audience, and it is rather well done, but because this is pretty much the note we end on, the movie just doesn’t feel complete. It seems like this whole year was just setting up for the events of the year to come, which it kind of was, but a movie should not feel like it as one watches it. It’s like when I order an expensive meal at a restaurant, eat it all, and I’m surprised to find it was not filling at all and I’m still hungry. Still, even if making the movie was just an excuse to show the scene with unconscious Ron mumbling about Hermione, I’d be totally okay with that and I could forgive many other aspects of the film. Also, my rating of this film is right on the border between 3.5 stars and 4 stars, and this was a very, very difficult decision. Sadly, because its story is weak, I do not think it would be fair to give it the same rating as I gave movies 2 and 5.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990) Review

August 23, 2014 by JD Hansel

I must say, I there’s a lot that I like about this movie. I don’t find the main characters very interesting or relatable, but the April O’Neil in the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is instantly more likable than Megan Fox’s take on the character. Really, the animatronics are not perfect, but I still think they look good enough for the job, and are far cooler to look at than CGI turtles. Splinter looks really great, and I often felt like he was a living creature, partly due to the performance given by Kevin Clash. I think that having the guy who performsand voices Splinter being the same person helps make him seem especially real. So, if you’re looking for great characters, the movie is alright, but from a technical standpoint, it’s really awesome.

The fighting looks very real, and some scenes are genuinely scary because of the ninjas that the turtles face and what they do. There were many occasions in which I thought that the shots/cinematography looked fantastic, and the same goes for the musical score. I really admired the way the story was structured as well. Overall, this movie’s a little slow, but it’s good if you’re looking for the right things. There’s a reason why this is considered to be a classic! (But don’t show it to young children – that would be a mistake.)